#thisismybeautiful

This was a hard post for me to write and it took me a while to write it. I truly believe that beauty and being comfortable in one's own skin is a personal struggle that everyone goes through at some point in time. Now I've always been skinny or thin and at one point I was way too skinny. For a bit I allowed it to define me and when I turned 21 I started to gain weight. Let me tell you ,when I tried on my pants and they did not fit I was so disappointed. I went up about two pant sizes and I was not sure what I was going to do. A few years later I started working out and was able to maintain my weight but I never got my original pants size back. I LOVE working out now! It is my stress reliever and most people know that teaching Zumba rocks my socks! I know I'm beautiful the way I am and so are you!

The biggest lie we allow Satan to whisper in our ears is that we are not fearfully and wonderfully made just the way God made us. True beauty can be found in Jesus. True beauty comes from the inside and your relationship with Jesus reflects your outside.

I have a plan. I want to make this hashtag into a big one! What is your beautiful? This is mine. Natural hair, brown skin, and all. I would love to see your pictures of what your pretty looks like. So post your pictures and use the hashtag #thisismybeautiful . You can find me on instagram @mydotson88 and on twitter @cutieandthegeek. There are already a few pictures there and two of them are mine. So post your pictures there as well. We all need to be uplifted every now and then. I would love to scroll through and see those beautiful photos.

"For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well."

Psalms 139: 13-14

Here's a quickie

Wow...this school year so far has shown me that I will NEVER have it all together, and that there is no such thing as having it all "together". Boy, I wish I did. With that being said, I have been beating myself up about having not posted to my blog for a while. I know most people do not follow me on instagram. So I am just writing  quick post to update everybody.

I started my new teaching position as a preschool special needs teacher. I love it. I have 9 boys in my morning class and let me tell you. As much as I love children, I am struggling. Boys are a whole different ball game than girls. Boys push, take, grab, hit, and touch everything!! I would not trade them for the world because I know by the end of the year they will have the hang of going to school, and they are my babies. Work has been awesome. I was not official staff last year because I was just a sub, but this year just feels like a continuation of last year. My preschool team has been great to work with. Regardless of how hard some of the days seem, my para and I spend most of the day laughing. Our motto has been "if we can not find humor in everything this will be a long year".

This year has been a busy one for Tim and I. We are both in school. I'm pursuing an endorsement and Tim is finishing up his degree (can't wait for May!). We are so thankful for the summer we just had because we were able to spend a lot of time together just getting to know each other more. Unfortunately, our schools schedules are crazy and there are some days where I only see him for maybe 20 minutes the whole day. I am attending a school that is an hour and twenty minutes away from where we live, and I go after work. It has been rough!!! Your prayers are appreciated :) By the grace of God we will both be done with school in May!

Married life has been awesome! I could not have imagined a better husband. We purchased a house the week of our wedding and we love our home. Its the perfect size and in the perfect location. God has truly blessed us with the opportunity to have our own house. It has been taking longer than I thought it would to get everything decorated. I just bought a decorative pillow for our bed and we have been here for about three months! Little by little it is coming along.

The Post About My Hair

So for friends who have known me for a while, you can obviously tell that my hair has most definitely changed over the past few months. This has a lot to do with the fact that I was fed up with my old hair and needed to do something different. For years I have been trying to grow my hair. I can honestly say that I have been obsessed with growing long hair since I was a little girl. Maybe it was all those princess movies that had girls with long flowing hair ( Pocahontas, Princess Jasmine, Ariel).

I was on a visit to my parent's house after spending a summer in Ohio. I had just gotten another perm and noticed how much shorter my hair was. I was so fed up and mad! I just knew that there had to be a way to solve the issues I felt I was having with my hair. So I got on my mom's tablet and started searching for ways to grow hair, and I happened upon BlackGirlLongHair.com. I noticed how healthy the hair was on the women who were on the site. I spent hours pouring over "natural hair" and happened upon videos on YouTube. It was then that I noticed that there was nothing wrong with my hair and should not longer continue trying to hide what God gave me. So, I decided on a day in Early August that I was no longer going to perm my hair anymore. I was going to be happy with what God gave me. I can honestly say that I have never been so happy with my hair, and it was all because I was willing to accept what God gave me.

I am now a year and a half perm free and I feel so much healthier. The change in hair health has also lead to me wanting to change my health in general. I just thank God for getting through to me and helping me see that I am beautiful the way He made me. So, with all this being said I plan to do posts about natural hair, and sharing some of the sites that I have found that have helped me. But for now enjoy these photos of me and my hair :D

What is your hair story? Share them with me!!!

On being content

So as most of you know I moved to Ohio this summer to be with my fiance'. We really needed the time together before we are married because our whole relationship has been long distance. I was very happy to make the move, and everything went so smoothly that I thought I was going to have a teaching job right away. Doors were opening for me here and I had two interviews, one with a job offer. I knew it was not the job for me so I turned it down. I just knew that I was going to be given a teaching job. The year came upon me and I started subbing in a school district almost an hour away from here. I was frustrated beyond belief. I knew that I needed something that was more consistent. I even contemplated working outside of education. I was going before the Lord and that was wrong of me. An opportunity opened up for a sub aide in a school closer to home. It paid WAY less than what I would make just subbing but I just felt that I should try it out.

My job was a one-on-one aide with two little prekindergarten boys. One in the morning and one in the afternoon. I went in and LOVED it! I never thought I would love working in special education. I immediately emailed the lady who books the job and told her I wanted the job for the rest of the year. Well, I have moved up to another position there in the same classroom, and I love working with the team of ladies I work with. The kids are super sweet! I love going to work. I literally wake up happy. I can honestly say that this has never happened before with a job. THANK YOU GOD! He is truly the best. I think He has taught me about faith, yet again, and that not everything is about the money. I truly love what I do. I feel for the first time in my teaching career that I am actually making a difference. I love my job.

And even better news. Timothy and I have finally booked a place for the wedding ceremony and reception. It is final we are getting hitched on May 25, 2014. 5 months and some days from now. Woot woot!

Well I wasn't going to leave you guys without pictures because we did make another trip to Columbus to get all my junk. As always thanks for the prayers. Here ya go. ENJOY!

We just got done with engagement pictures and were going to this awesome restaurant to eat in Chattanooga.

We, well Tim drove a huge Penske truck all the way to Ohio.

Look how awesome Cincinnati looks! 

I had to save goodbye to my childhood home :(

Thoughts on Substitute Teaching

May I say that God constantly has His way of humbling me. I must say that when the thought of moving to Ohio came across my mind, I just totally thought it was going to be easy. HAHAHAHA was I wrong!!! I had all these doors opening up for me I just knew I was going to have a job. Nope, I got all my documentation, took a ton of tests, and all I get to do is sub. Now subbing here is way different than subbing back home. For instance, people do it as a job. So imagine how frustrated I was when I discovered that I was competing for subbing jobs with people who would never get jobs as teachers in the school systems. UGH!!! That's all I could say, and to this day I am still competing with people who aren't teachers. I have been blessed that one city 40 minutes away is in desperate need of substitute teachers so most of my work has come from them. Now, yes I am frustrated with this whole situation, but I am faithful that God has given me the jobs that he has. So without further ado, here are my pros and cons of substitute teaching

PROS

1. I get to pick and choose the days I work. This has come in handy for Tim and I seeing that we are traveling a lot recently.

2. If I get a crazy class, I do NOT have to go back!!! This has happened before and although I was complimented on "how well" I handled the class. I probably will not go back haha.

3. It is nice to learn about the areas that are near here. The cities are pretty close so it is nice to know we have tons of choices as to where we want to live.

4. The kids in the city I live in are so sweet!!! That's why the jobs are so competitive. The kids are so sweet and loving.

5. And hopefully, just hopefully, this will lead me to a teaching job :)

6. I feel that substitute teaching has started to humble me and strengthen my faith.

CONS

1. I have been subbing 40 minutes away almost everyday.

2. It is so competitive. There are some days that I just wish I could quit and take a regular job doing something else.

3. It frustration I feel blows my mind. I can not believe how much I have had to just trust God. Next week, I am trusting that God will bring me jobs, because right now, I do not have any.

4. Stress. The stress I feel is UNREAL.

I know that I complained A LOT, but it is so hard to go from having full-time work, to having sporadic work. I know that there is a bigger plan. I know that God has a plan for me and Tim. I just ask that as my readers you pray for my faith, and that you pray for Tim and I. I promise that my next post will be a happy one, but I am human. As a human, I have struggles, and well, I have hit a big on haha. Until next time...